Negativity in the Workplace: Part 2

Quote of the Day:


If you are building a culture where honest expectations are communicated and peer accountability is the norm, then the group will address poor performance and attitudes.

Henry Cloud

Wrong Expectations

Your expectations shape your reality. They can change your life, emotionally and physically. You need to be extra careful about (and aware of) the expectations you harbor as the wrong ones make life unnecessarily difficult. Be especially wary of the expectations that follow—they give people all kinds of trouble.

Letting your doubts cloud your belief in someone (or something) practically ensures their failure.

We get the most out of other people when we believe in them. Research shows that this happens because when we believe in someone,

    • we treat them better than people we think will fail,
    • we give them more opportunities to succeed than we give those we think will fail,
    • we give them more accurate, helpful feedback than we give others, and
    • we do more teaching because we believe it’s time well spent.

Here are 8 unrealistic expectations for yourself:

  1. Life should be fair
  2. Opportunities will fall in my lap
  3. Everyone should like me
  4. People should agree with me
  5. People know what I’m trying to say
  6. I’m going to fail
  7. Things will make me happy
  8. I can change him/her


How do you put a stop to your unrealistic expectations towards others?

  1. Choose one person of whom you have unrealistic expectations
  2. Identify all your expectations of this one person.
    Write down all your expectations of this person. Start each sentence with “I expect him/her to…”
  3. Apply the golden rule to each expectation
  4. Put yourself in the other person’s shoes
  5. Remind yourself of your unrealistic expectations
  6. Talk openly about your unrealistic expectations.
    If you have been giving this person grief about being late for dinner, find an opportunity to tell him/her that you realize it is unrealistic to expect him/her to always be punctual. He/she will feel relieved that the burden of your unrealistic expectation has been lifted from his/her back.



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